As parents, we’re always trying various, sometimes dubious, tactics to shield our little ones from harm’s way. When Bella, who gets uncontrollable diarrhea when she eats grapes skin, incessantly asks to eat grapes, I do what any good parent would do; make up a lie and say grapes are poisonous. Or when she tries to dart out into the street I yell, “Big car coming!”, even when nothing is in sight, so she comes running back onto the sidewalk.
Sometimes, more conniving maneuvers are needed to remove noxious influences from our children’s lives. Like when Bella came home from McDonald’s with Daddy with a new “Donald’s Toy”, a near-shirtless, mini-skirt-clad Bratz doll with so much makeup on she looked like a day hooker on the Vegas strip. “Look, Mommy, Donald’s Toy!” Bella proudly proclaimed as she held out her new toy. Jin and I exchanged looks of concern (the kind of look only first-time parents give each other as if to say, “what the heck are we gonna do?”) We allowed her to play with the doll the remainder of the day, but Jin and I later agreed that we would “remove” the doll (a.k.a. dump it in the trash).
Hoochie-Mamma Bratz
So being the good parent, I took the doll when Bella was at school and threw in the trash. I even carefully laid it head-down so that anyone taking a quick glance in the trashcan – which has a lid – would not be able to spot it. Did I feel guilty? No, sir.
Later that night as I was preparing dinner, I gave Bella some carrots to munch on to hold her until mealtime. In true Bella form, she shoved all four baby carrots in her mouth and was chewing for what seemed like an eternity. Finally she decided she would chew no more so she reached for my hand and spit out her mouthful of half-masticated carrots into my palm. She watched me dump out the carrots in the trash but then must have spotted the head-down Donald’s toy in the trash. By then, I had returned to cooking until I spotted her reaching into the garbage for her doll.
“Donald’s Toy... Mommy, why is Donald’s Toy in the trash?” she asked sadly as tears welled up in her eyes.
I froze not knowing what to say. “Hey, what’s that toy doing in the trash? Who put it there?” I sheepishly asked. How could I explain to a two-year-old that the Bratz doll symbolized nothing more than our society’s negative and demeaning image of what girls should look like? McDonalds should be ashamed for irresponsibly promoting such a toy!
Ok, maybe I’m being harsh, but really, as a parent I did my part to eliminate the negative influence in Bella’s life. She just happened to find the stupid doll in the trash and mommy was too much of a sucker to keep it there. I continued my game of innocence and lead Bella to the sink where we washed off The Bratz. Soon the tears from Bella’s eyes dried up and she was happily playing with it again. But now I’m left with the same dilemma. What’s a parent to do?
Meanwhile, back to Bella-land, here's installment 1 of "Bella and Bunny":
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